Richard Pricey + Wispa Gold

September 18, 2009

5th of September, 2009
The birthday present I want to get for my friend (who’s birthday was on 29th of July – yes, I know, shame on me) costs $20 before delivery. The dollar is kind of weak against the euro, though, so as long as shipping doesn’t cost too much I should be fine. So now I know how much I have to save. It’s a recession, though! I might put it off until Christmas so that it’s like a Birthmas present. You’re probably thinking “What the fuck? It’s going to take you until Christmas to pull $20 together?” Well no, it probably won’t. But just in case… I definitely will get it, though, eventually. She got me a class The Lonely Island t-shirt for my birthday. Oh yeah, we’re obsessed with The Lonely Island. I got their album from my Dad for my birthday, too. It was a good year.
Anyway, the present I’m hoping to get her (please God she doesn’t read this, or the surprise will be ruined!) is the Richard Pryor t-shirt that Jonah Hill wears in Superbad. Whenever we watch it she always comments on how much she loves his t-shirt so she’ll like it. If I have any extra dosh, I’ll get her the Teen Witch DVD, too. Another Lonely Island related inside joke. (If you’re confused, search “Dude-a-tude” on YouTube. God, I love it.
So today’s lesson is Richard Pryor t-shirts are around $20.
OOOH OOOH. I also found out today that there’s such a thing as Caramel Wispas. Or, “Wispa Gold” or whatever it’s called. They’re nice, but possibly a bit too caramelly. I took a bite and ended up with a bit string of caramel halfway down my neck. Attractive? Yes.

I stole my sister’s mascara now I’m grounded for a week.

September 12, 2009

4th of September, 2009
You’re supposed to change your mascara every 3 months because it gets ridden with bacteria and you could get eye infections and the like. Crazy.
Also, the reason people die from Carbon Monoxide is because when you inhale the.. thingys.. in Carbon Monoxide you think you’re breathing in Oxygen, but you’re really inhaling things that latch onto your cells and block them so that no Oxygen can’t be carried around your body in your blood so you suffocate. That’s really scary, isn’t it?

Emily Dickinson?

September 12, 2009

3rd of September, 2009

I got the poetry book I was supposed to get before today, and I was reading about Emily Dickinson so today I learned a bit about her life. It’s so interesting. She liked to keep to herself most of the time, and she was quite philosophical. I never knew anything about her and I never read a poem of hers, but I liked the ones I read today. The rhythm of her poems are like the poems I write. We’re one in the same. Kidding, but I do like her. We’re quite similar in some ways from what I read.

Thank you, Mars!

September 12, 2009

2nd of September, 2009

Mars’ gravity stops meteorites from hitting earth. Thank you, Mars!

Tell me why I don’t like Mondays? (well, 1st of September was a Tuesday…)

September 12, 2009

1st of September, 2009
Hmm, let’s see. Today I learned that I’m in 5B, which I’m sure you’re all excited to know. I started back at school today. 5th year, wahey. I learned, or more like I realised, that I’m fairly motivated to do well in school over the next two years. In all honesty, over the first 3 years of my secondary school life I only remember doing homework about 4 or 5 times. I shit you not. I never did a tap of work. The sad thing is that I was well capable of doing really well, too. Without studying at all, I got 5 b’s, 2 c’s and 2 d’s in my Junior Cert. I’m not proud of the d’s, or even the c’s, but I think that’s quite good for not having studied or done any homework on the subjects. The d’s were in Maths and History – my two least favourite subjects – so I was just really happy that I didn’t fail them. Like, pathetically delighted. And then last year I didn’t have to do anything because I was in Transition Year, and I didn’t do the tiny bit of work that I was meant to, either.
Anyway, the reason I think I’m so motivated now is that I’m sick of people thinking I’m thick because I never hand in homework or get brilliant grades, when I’m not. It was a thick move on my part, I know, but I mean if that was the best of my ability then I wouldn’t care but knowing it’s not makes me want to surprise people. I don’t know. I really feed off the approval of others, which isn’t a great thing to be able to say, but at least I’m aware of it.
Oh, you might be wondering what sparked this desire to write all this crap down. I chose to do Honours Maths and my Maths teacher, who never taught me before, was like “What did you get in your Junior Cert?” and when I told her I got a D she told me I wouldn’t be fit for honours, and that it would be too hard for me so I should do pass. Fuck off! Way so be supportive and encouraging, bitch. She’s some breed of wank so she is. She actually told me that it would probably go over my head. Dick.

Finally, on a different note, crocodiles can go for 2 years without eating. Or so I hear.

Princess Diana and Poetry

September 12, 2009

31st of August, 2009
Princess Diana died on the 31st of August, 1997. I never knew the date. I always thought it was around Halloween because I have a vague memory of coming out of my house all set to go trick-or-treating (I must have been quite young because my mum stopped letting me go trick-or-treating for a few years because she thought it was demonic and satanic and the like) when I heard people talking about it on a the radio in one of the neighbors’ cars. That was the first I’d heard of it, as far as I know.
I also learned today that I bought the wrong poetry book for school, which starts tomorrow. Fuck sake. It was written on the booklist and everything and I still managed to get a completely different one that doesn’t even have a similar name, or look anything like the book I was supposed to get. What a tool I am.

Herdwick Sheep :)

September 12, 2009

30th of August, 2009
Just look at them!
There’s a unique breed of sheep called Herdwick sheep that are only found in the west of England. There are only about 100,000 of them in existence (less after Foot and Mouth, I think). In my opinion, they’re much better than our crappy sheep. They’re cuter and look like more fun. I kind of get a llama-like impression off them, too… Hmm..

Cows go MOO.

September 12, 2009

29th of August, 2009
Day 3 outside the bedroom. I went over to more neighbors for keys. No luck. However, my Mum was talking to the first lady I went to and she just gave her a bunch of keys she had found and… they worked! I’m in! Thanks to the mother. She finally came in handy. Haha, just kidding.

In other news, scientists have discovered that some animals have developed regional accents. That’s quite cool, don’t you think? xD

Funny People

September 12, 2009

28th of August, 2009
Day 2 outside the bedroom. Uncool. I went over to our neighbors (all the houses are the same in this estate) who I’d never met before and explained my woeful story, and asked if I could check if any of the keys in their doors would fit my bedroom lock? Maybe the corresponding bedroom in their house? They were really nice about it, but no luck. They couldn’t find half the door keys, sadly. The lady of the house explained that they had taken they keys out of most of the doors in case one of the kids might lock themselves in or what not. I wish my mother had taken my keys off me, then I wouldn’t be in this lil’ pickle. Oh well, it makes for full “Something New” entries, however dull the subject may be.
What I learned today, however, is that Judd Apatow and Adam Sandler used to be room-mates (or is it roomates?). I saw Funny People today. I really liked it. I love all the main characters, and there were some great laughs. I saw a review on Teletext that only gave it 2 stars and a bad review. It may not have been what the reviewer was expecting (probably a more Superbad/Pineapple Express (LOVE THEM) type of film that’s jam-packed with one-liners) but that doesn’t mean it was bad. It wasn’t. I’d see it again. I’ll probably buy it someday, anyway. I want to own the full Apatow collection. I’m not even sure if you can get things like Undeclared on DVD, but I’ll get everything else. I will. You’d think I’d have more exciting plans for any money I make in the future. Well, I do. I want to go to America. I want to live outside of Ireland for a few years. I want to give to charity. I want to treat my Mum. If I ever came into a lot of money, I’d give it to my Mum. She needs it more than I do. I just want enough money to live comfortabley, and I know even that is a lot to hope for. I’m optimistic, though! Don’t begrudge me my optimism, readers. I’m not being cocky or over confident. I’m just taking advantage of the fact that the world hasn’t killed my spirit just yet!

It’s a lockout and I’m embarassed…

September 12, 2009

27th of August, 2009
Okay kids, todays lesson is a much more humbling one on my part. First of all, I am an idiot, and I am well aware of this. I may try to write like I know a thing or two, but it’s all an illusion. When it comes down to common sense, I’m useless.
Last night I went out on the town, and I locked my bedroom door and took the key with me. Came home, the key is nowhere to be found. When I asked my friends and family if by any chance they had it they all replied “Why the hell did you take your bedroom key with you in the first place?” so I’m sure that’s what you’re thinking, too. I live at home with my Mum and brother and I like to have that little bit of privacy, thank you very much! I’d rather not have people going in and out of my room willy nilly when I’m not around, y’know? So anyway, now I am locked out of my room. I have no clean clothes, no iPod, no DVDs, no books, no charger, no hair dryer or hair straightener. None of that. What’s worse is that the person who I thought I had given my keys to to mind in her bag doesn’t have them. Where the fuck are they?! We went into the place where we were out last night to see if they had found any keys – no luck. We tried every key in the house to see if it would fit the door – no luck. We took off the handle and tried to screwdrive our way outta this mess, no luck. Why am I saying we and our? Anyway, here I am. I slept on the couch last night and it looks like I will tonight, too. Yay.
So the lesson is, don’t take your keys, or anything you don’t want to risk losing, out with you unless it’s absolutely necessary! Especially if you’re going to be drinking. That’s all I’m saying. Don’t be a fool like your Auntie Nadine. I’m sure none of you need telling but whatevs, it was a lesson learned the hard way for me. Now I’m suffering for it.